CRIMINAL STUPIDITY

Stupid long weekend. I know that to most of you, it was a
good break from the humdrum of daily routine but, 3 days??? I would have
welcomed the prospect if I was able to go out of town. A weekend in the
scorching metro is not my idea of fun let alone three days. It’s tough bumming
around when you’ve been bumming around for the past two months. I miss my
nephews and my nieces. I usually get to be with them during Sundays but they’re
out of town. Lucky them… My friends are too busy with their own lives to bother
with me. Which hits me with this conclusion: I HAVE NO LIFE!!! Good thing I
have a blog to keep me busy for a few minutes. Oh well..

*This is an article I read in
the Bonifacio Law Journal, the official publication of the Andres Bonifacio
College of Law in Dipolog City. I came across the copy in my friend’s law
office. His dad happens to be the dean of the said law school. Thanks Ron for
being kind enough to lend it to me and for reminding me that it’s your only copy.
I’ll return it asap.

  • South Carolina: A man walked into a local
         police station, dropped a bag of cocaine on the counter, informed the desk
         sergeant that it was substandard cut, and asked that the person who sold
         it to him be arrested immediately.
  • Indiana: A man walked up to a cashier at a
         grocery store and demanded all the money in the register. When the cashier
         handed him the loot, he fled leaving his wallet on the counter.
  • Location unknown: A man went into a drug store
         pulled a gun, announced a robbery, and pulled a hefty-bag face mask over
         his head – and realized that he’d forgotten to cut eye holes in the mask.
  • Location unknown: A man successfully broke
         into a bank after hours and stole – are you ready for this? – the bank’s
         video camera, while it was recording remotely. (That is, the videotape
         recorder was located elsewhere in the bank, so he didn’t get the videotape
         of himself stealing the camera. The police, however, did.
  • North Carolina: A man successfully broke into
         a bank’s basement through a street-level window, cutting himself pretty
         badly in the process. He then realized that (1) he could not get to the
         money from where he was, (2) he could not climb back out the window
         through which he came, and (3) he was bleeding pretty badly. So, he
         located a phone and dialed “911” for help.
  • Location unknown: A man walked into a Circle-K
         (a convenience store similar to a 7-11), put a $20 bill on the counter and
         asked for change. When the clerk opened the cash register, the man pulled
         a gun and asked for all the cash, which the clerk promptly provided. The
         man took the cash and fled—leaving the $20 bill on the counter. The total
         amount of cash he got from the drawer? $15.
  • Vernon, British Columbia: Raymond Cuthbert
         dropped by a drug store to say that he and his accomplice would be back in
         30mins to rob the place. On time for their appointment, they were arrested
         by the Royal Canadian Mounted Police.
  • Sao Paulo, Brazil: Psychiatrist Oscar
         Dominguez was listening to a patient talk about her sex life when he
         pulled out a gun and shot her to death. As he explained to the court, “ I
         just couldn’t take those nut cases anymore.”
  • Rouen, France: Moments after robbing a bank,
         Jules Duprer jumped into a car, shouting, “Get away quick, before the cops
         come.” He failed to notice that the car he was counting on to sprint him
         away to safety was a police car.
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