i wanna be selfish

If you are in love right now, you shouldn’t read this. I suggest that you bookmark this post and then get back to it after you’ve been dissed and dismissed. This is *hate love* post from an overly jaded, severely whacked anti-love. It foretells of what would befall you "soon".

Sometimes I think about how great it’d be if I were selfish. No one to think and care about but myself. Wouldn’t it be great if no one cared about anyone else but themselves? Think about it, you wouldn’t have to get hurt about not being loved, or people letting you down. You only feel bad when you let yourself down, and with that you know, ou only have yourself to blame.

It’s be wonderful to be self-sufficing. Not care what anyone would think. Not care about love because you only love yourself. Loving someone sucks. Sure. People say that love is a wonderful thing. I’d like to hear them say that after they’ve gotten dumped, or cheated on, or kept on only to be told nasty and hurtful things to. Trying to save a faltering relationship is like trying to fashin a rope ladder out of gossamer.

I have a theoretical philosophy, don’t fall in love. Fool around, fuck around, flirt around, but never ever fall in love, kasi ung love, sa umpisa lang yan. When you fall in love, when the excitement phase has faded, everything is fair game. Talo-talo na. Your true selves start rearing their ugly heads and when you talk (or the other person talks), the other person (or yourself) doesn’t hear it, it’s just a roaring in the ears.

But of course, my bestfriend, with whom I am talking to as I write this post, is for the time being, in love. He says that "hindi happy ang life, pag walang lovelife." *I’m betting my ass he got that from a movie he saw on Cinema1.* In that is the fatal flaw. Love has been equated to be sine qua non to hapiness. That’s just stupid. The best love stories are not of love, but of heartbreak. The same goes for love songs, and love poems. Everyone can relate to a tragic love story. Even if you’re in love, admit it, a good love *hurt* song or movie would jerk your tear ducts.

Damit, I hate love. I hate being in love. I wanna be selfish. I want to only think of myself, my own happiness, and not care about the other person!


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